Last week, my 9 month old hit a milestone and excitedly looked around the room for me to share in his sheer delight and to offer encouragement using the ‘annoying kiddie voice’ that we’ve both become accustomed to. I wasn’t there.
We moved from London to the US when he was 3 months old. I felt brave & excited.
Returning to work when he was 6 months old was bittersweet. I felt happy to be getting part of my former self back, yet sad to leave him with a carer. I was excited to return to a job and company that I love, yet worried I was doing the right thing for him.
Stay at home Mums, I truly salute you.
You selflessly surrender your former self to be the round the clock caregiver for the little people in your life. You possibly feel guilty for not contributing financially. Ironically, your value cannot ever be monetised. In addition, those little people are very fortunate to have you with them daily.
Working Mums, I truly salute you, too.
It’s a 24/7 balancing act. The guilt of leaving your little one with a caregiver while you jump back in the saddle and regain a sense of independence & enjoy (too much) hot coffee doesn’t ever fully disappear. It hangs out with the pressure you place on yourself with regard to job performance, how peers evaluate the ‘new you’, before going out to lunch with the ‘will my child resent me for this when s/he’s older?’ thought process.
I can only speak from my own experience, but the long days & personal sacrifices are worth it, and I don’t feel overly guilty for enjoying it. This week, after just three months in the US, Invotra has taken a significant step forward and confirmed our participation in Code for America. It’s big, exciting and fits us perfectly.
It’s all for him. Well, most of it is for him. I still get a high from the sense of anticipation as to what’s around the corner. I feel very lucky, dark circles aside. The future is SO bright…